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Master Pio

That wasnt good

woof that was brutal.


And I cannot emphasize the woof in woof enough... nor the oof in woof.


That fuckin stunk.


Yesterday the Jets opened the season at home agains the Buffalo "canada" Bills and I dont know where to begin or to end with the recap on the game. So im just gonna spray and pray on this one.


We had 4 turnovers in the first half, a pick six, 2 fumble recoveries and another interception. In the 3rd quarter we recorded a asafety, but of course we had to wash it all down with a squandered 16-0 lead that dissapeared like my credit after the strip club. A collapse reminiscent to my credit in the forms of both financial and self-respect after those long dark dark nights.


....Who am i kidding. Just like the Jets, those strippers were never going to take my marriage proposals seriously.




At least our new guys looked good. Our 2 big tickets, both CJ and Leveon are looking to be worth every dog god damn penny. And Get well CJ Mosely. I hope injuries arent something that hampers your career cause your special.


for all you "i dont watch bad football" watchers, CJ Mosely was everywhere.


Mosey on in there big fella


CJ recorded A pick six, recovered a fumble, and saved a touchdown all in 3 quarters. He was clearly orchestrating the Jets defense and after his 3rd down td-saving deflection in the 3rd q , those Bills 0 points quickly turned into 16. Without Mosley, the Jets couldnt distinguish their ass from their head. "I’m all right right now,” Mosley said to CSB reporter Pio. “It hurts a little bit to plant, so that’s pretty much why I couldn’t go back in.”


Then It was the same old jets problems everywhere else. Leonard "QB Hits should count in contract negotiations" Williams didnt step up when was needed, our cornerbacks are absolute liabilities, and "Checkdown" Sam Darnold should not be athing . Cause if ive said it once ive said it a hundred times. Alright. Believe you me. A QB with 28 completions shouldnt only muster up 175 yards and a QB throwing it 40+ times shouldnt be filled with god damn checkdowns -- meaning i want to see some uncorked beauties.


(I just wanted to take a break in this to remind you all how not fun it is writing this)


For some good energy:

Leveon Bell is a saving grace nd i am absolutely thrilled we have this guy. He saw 23 touches on 17 carries for 60 yards. With some really special runs sprinkled in there for a guy who hasnt played a down of football in over 600 days:



He converted on a 4 and 1 too late in the game - which nfortunately meant nothing because Darnold couldnt hit Robby deep the play after.


Leveon got his first TD as a jet on a 9yd shoelace catch and followed that up with the 2 point conversion

Bell had 6 catches for 32 and a TD


and I pray to the energy lords that Bell can stay healthy




Not much more to add besides we should go out and find a cornerback. Which isnt surprsing. But If the Bills passing game and 3rd string Tight End Josh Allen was able to shred us, then were absolutely fucked next week when we play the Browns who have OBJ and Jarvis. And the weekend after that? Were playing these assholes Patriots with some guys named Josh Gordon, Antonio Brown, and Julian Edelman.



Adam Gase kept his Jets offense trapped in a case and was outcoached by the Canadian Bills HC. He couldnt get Sam going and more importantly couldnt capitalize on 4 turnovers and thats god damn inexcusable and unusable moving forwrd.


Our kicker is some scandinavian thats too busy sounding funny, because obviously theres some confusion/miscommunication/poor translation. See In our western civilization we call a bad throw or even a kick a "duck". - well apparently in Norway, Duck must be a delicacy because of their surplus of fish. And Kaare Vedvik must translate to "i suck ass"


Leave it on one last good energy?

The Lachness Monster. Lachlan Edwards. Our punter had 7 punts, 5 within the 20. Call him Steve Nash because he basically set up the Mosley pick six and the safety.



Spray and Pray baby. Spray and pray.


justifiTAKEcion alert:

Dating back 3 Head coaches over the years, Todd Bowles, Rex Ryan, and Eric Mangini all started their first season with a win. And Look where that got us.

So why not shake things up and start out the new head coachs' season with a loss? Tell me where im wrong there.



What do i predict moving forwarD?


And that captialized D wasnt a typo. I think Gregg Williams either kills Adam Gase with his bare hands by week 4 bye or straight up quits.


And I do think its going to be harder before it gets easier.


Either way - theres no way, no chance this defense performs at this level and stays quiet and content with a very dull and lackluster performance by Gases offense. That can cause some internal problemos.


BUT


I do think the return of Chris Herndongomez will lead us to a strong mid season push as Herndon is obviously a talent and one of darnold preferred catchers. Hes gonna open things up for Robby, for Crowder, for Quincy and most importantly for Bell.



Hang tight my people.


When we suffer 1 we all suffer together



Energy > Matter


I lov eyou



Pio






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